Keeping the Faith in the Face of Reality

Here we are at the end of February...the snow is thick on the ground and falling. The temperatures have been fluctuating wildly, often within the space of 10 or 12 hours. I am on a short break between opera and ballet in my “other” job, and even 4 days in feeling pretty wrung out. And I have sent off another vendor application and fee.

It is cold, I am tired and want little more than to huddle on the couch with a warm kitten in my lap and drink a boatload of tea. The thought of going to even my indoor studio, ('cause there is no way I'm going out to the forge today!) wears me out. But in its own way so does the list of ideas in my head, the longer they wait to be attempted the more wearing they are. There are far too many days when just the idea of making dinner is more daunting than I can face, but still, I persist. I make things.

In spite of shows that are financially a bust (rarely is there a show that does not have some non-monetary value for me in friends, contacts, and learning)...in spite of all the work that went into an Etsy site that feels marginally futile(views but no sales)...in spite of all the evidence to the contrary I persist.

Like many artists entrepreneurs and small businesses who struggle in the face of a shift in the economic trends, the fashion trends, the societal trends...for some reason we all persist. In my case, I hedge my bets by having a “job” - my part-time career that has so often paid the way for my business. And I'm one of the lucky ones in the way that works out for me.

Why? How? ….Why do we keep going?

For many of us, we know – we believe – that the work is good. It is not a fault of the work. For most of us we are driven, we need to do the work – whatever it is. We know that for one reason or another it is important on some fundamental level.

It is hard, in the cold dark hours, but we do it. We keep the faith. We keep doing the work even when the work feels like it is our undoing.

Maybe we are mad, mad as the proverbial chemically compromised Hatter.

So, maybe today I will huddle on the couch...but before my time at home is out I will pick up the hammer, or the pliers. I will rediscover the joys of that costly bag of stones I bought just waiting to be worked. I will move some of the ideas out of my head and let them flow from my hands. Some of them may still be with me ten years on, but even knowing won't stop me.

So for those of you out there who are feeling futile and overwhelmed in the face of the weather, the economic realities and life in general...know that right or wrong you are not alone and I, for one, look forward to discovering your work – whatever it is.