Motivation Maneuvers

Motivation Maneuvers

This is going to be a rough draft. Very rough. I woke up this morning thinking about it, but didn't know what to say. I still don't, but I need to start. And sometimes it is just about starting.

Sometimes it is just about starting. When you are self-employed, even if it is only part-time...motivation is a kicker. You are probably self-employed because you love what you do – you are driven to do it at all costs. And yet.

I would love to say particularly if you are in a creative field, but I'm sure it applies just as much to sales, to counselling and consulting and to all kinds of other fields. I suspect that if you have a storefront or an office it makes it slightly easier. You have to be present at that office for your clients or customers. Maybe people book appointments. Maybe you have to pay rent.

A home studio or home office, well, that is a different ball of wax. As much as you love what you do, there are days – sometimes weeks, where everything feels more pressing so that you can avoid the fact that you don't feel inspired to create. The dog needs to be walked. The dishes need to be done. The cat is feeling neglected and needs a cuddle. There is all that laundry, and it would be so much easier to feel creative if only I could get that shelving unit properly organized.

All these things are likely true. You aren't lying to yourself, but you are avoiding the thing you say you want to do. The thing you are supposed to be doing. The thing that drives you (and sometimes drives you insane...)

And when you are only able to do it part-time, when you need the security blanket of another income source because strangely, you enjoy eating...well, then all the above things are doubly true, because you only have a portion of the time. And you are tired. You've been working at that/those other jobs. And if you do give in to the laundry, the dog walking, the dinner making, the shelf organizing, well...you've been working and trying to keep up everything else that makes life tick. Don't you deserve to sit and read for an hour or two? Surely you have earned the right to a cup of tea and a nap?

And again...all of this is true. And like other human animals, you do, in fact deserve, and need some down time (insert guilty or otherwise pleasure here). But that thing you aren't doing is still there, still tickling the back of your brain and as much as you want it to let go, it won't.

And I did say SELF emlployed...that means that you also have

to do the marketing, the advertising, the cash handling (if there is any...), the accounting, the taxes, the scheduling, the ordering, the inventory, the cleaning, answer the mail, the emails, the phone...(write the blog entries)...there are photos to process, print to write, tools to maintain...and yes, garbage and recycling to take out.

And then, maybe, you can squeeze in being creative...

Hah!

The trouble is the longer you avoid it the sneakier it gets. Avoiding it for too long a time will likely make you cranky, out of sorts, possibly depressed. It will often get hard to focus, difficult to keep track, it makes everything harder...that's right. Everything. That includes making it harder to get creative, to be productive at your passion. You've been away from it for so long, you don't feel like you can anymore, you aren't sure you can do it. And so you avoid it, and so it spirals.

Until you can't ignore it anymore, and even if what you make is pure unadulterated crap, you have to make something...

Sometimes it is just about starting.

Quite often it will take itself from there. Not always, sometimes it really takes time to get back into the flow of it, to remember what life is like when you are in the zone. Sometimes it feels like you will never get there.

And the laundry still needs doing, and the dog still needs walking, and the shelf still needs organizing, but often once you are back in the flow and hum of it, those times are a part of the process. While you are walking the dog you see a leaf on a tree that the light is hitting just so and you realize that you could make...and the smell of the laundry detergent makes you think of that time you were with those people and you had that idea that you had forgotten all about.

Sometimes it is just about starting. Other times it is about discipline. The discipline to sit down and write Every Day, even if you are all written out. The discipline to go out to the studio or shop, even if all you do is clean up and maintain your tools. The follow through to spend just that half hour before you curl up with your book.

Being self employed is hard. No matter what you do, whether it is full time or part time. It isn't about running family errands or sitting watching soap operas through the day. It is about working when you don't want to, on things you don't want to because it is what you want to do. It is about finding time that doesn't exist and energy that you don't have. It is about believing you can, even when you know that you can't yet. Sometimes,

it is just about starting.